National Day of something or other

nobody@vox.com(Artzy Carmen) — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 06:54:57 -0700

A friend sent out a mass email this morning about tomorrow being the National Day of Prayer and how important it is to pray. And my initial reaction was strong and negative. It was “What good is prayer when hearts and minds of the people are already made up and God has been stuffed in a tiny little church shaped box, sealed with a kiss and put on the upper shelf in the closet?”

Uh…

yeah!

Surprised me too!

And this is exactly what pastor preached about Sunday. He talked about how we quit praying when we get disillusioned about how ineffective our prayers sometimes feel. And I watched a beautiful couple come forward and pray again for children. And since I’ve been there I about lost it. I was playing piano and could clearly see the pain in their prayer. It was horrible in a really risky vulnerable beautiful sort of way. Lots of tears and in that little clump of praying faithful ones.

So… I’m trying to wriggle my way out of my unbelief and fatalism and try on something a little more like hope and faith… Yeah, let’s pray for our nation tomorrow. Not because it’s the National Day of Prayer (which means little to me.) But because God is big enough to change hearts and minds, and prayer is still the avenue he chooses to use to bring about that change. We need Him. I need Him. I have friends who need Him. My children need Him. Yeah, but most of all I need Him.

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What do you want? The Church Chapter

nobody@vox.com(Artzy Carmen) — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 17:07:26 -0700

A friend’s blog contained the question “What do you want?” with a related question having to do with whether or not you're praying for what you want. It’s an interesting thought, especially since it’s really easy to get wrapped up in life and lose track of those things that are really near and dear to us. Suddenly we find the important things slipping away as the mundane atrocities of life choke out the dreaming, desiring and hoping aspects of our being. We get wrapped up in the temporal desires and needs and completely lose focus on those things that we desire that are of a more eternal nature.

I have a desire that’s pretty unusual, judging from the practice of life I’ve observed. I want to go to a church that I’m excited about. An emerging church that looks like some of the books I have on my reading list. Seriously, I want to be involved with an emerging church with people I respect who are so outside the box that we make a new box and invite people in. (Not because we are spiritually superior, but because we are interesting.) I want to work with the church to help poor and needy people in our community and do community service projects instead of services some weeks.

I don’t want it to meet in a normal church building or be a “normal” church at all and definitely not on Sunday morning. (another barf.) We could meet at the park for all I care. I want a full tilt dangerous honest to goodness church where people finally “get it” that it’s not about a service – yet it’s about service. It’s not a building centric thing but could happily meet in a variety of places. And since it’s about community, it would be cool if we all lived close enough together that we could really become intentional community, and share our stuff and help each other out by bartering services among the members and really connecting with people on a deeper level. No religion, no pretense, and for heavens sake - if you don’t want to be at the gathering then don’t come! Oh, and there should be food involved! Good food! And tables seem to go good with the eating thing. Uh, and chairs.

Oh, and if I’m going to have to show up to some sort of service, then I want it to be a full tilt artsy thing with lots of interesting stuff going on. Incense is good, and artwork that changes each week would be cool. My brother is carving a cross and it progresses a little each week at his church. Now how cool would that be?! I want lots of dancers doing their thing, I love it when the dancers “dance upon injustice.” I love it when they use big fabrics, banners, flags and Chinese ribbons. These things delight me. No preach praying allowed, poetry hoped for and plenty of reading from the Song of Solomon – which also delights me, and the Psalms which are better yet. And I like the big projection screens with lots of excellent color and artwork! Go ahead, distract me! I like it! I want to try all kinds of traditions and not do the same thing twice for any reason – especially not because that’s how we did it before. Couldn’t someone read the introduction to “The Hobbit” one time? I could gladly preach on that. Let’s use donut holes for communion for crying out loud, and maybe the health freaks can refrain from making an unholy uproar over it for just once. And music! There must be lots of music of a variety of styles. I want to play and sing in the worship team that is full of really killer good musicians who are also actually interesting people. I want some “harp and bowl” worship along with whatever other kind of music makes God’s people happy.

And there should be prayer. Prayer for people individuals, about things that matter. Not just about so and so who is in the hospital – those kinds of prayer requests we talk about just to fill up uncomfortable space. But the real prayer requests we are scared to share cause they make us look… uh… human. Real. Transparent. Authentic. Human.

I guess my prayer about church is pretty much swallowed up in complacency most of the time. I go and stomach the ordinariness of it most of the time. Sometimes for brief flashes I’m engaged and intent on what is happening around me. If something is happening around me. And I want to be a part of the story, writing the story, living the story.

I told my mom when I was a little kid, I wanted to be in the next books they add to the Bible. Hmmm… yeah, didn’t quite strike the chord with her that it could have, but it’s still pretty much true. I just want to be involved in the next chapters, that’s all.

I know many of my ideas are pretty strange on this one, plenty of religious folk would be rightfully concerned about such disrespect for tradition and predictability. And any lessor God would have squished me by now, especially since I find a lot of His people especially annoying. But I have somehow escaped so far. Thank God. For real. Thank God.

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